I first heard about Real Social Dynamics when I watched Tyler’s videos on youtube. At first I wasn’t buying it, but I was willing to learn more. Tyler just seemed so incredibly self-assured that, although I couldn’t be sure if the women in the video were picked randomly, I could tell by the way he carried himself that he was a confident guy who was successful with the ladies – which is exactly what I wanted to be.
Before I started researching about RSD, I had just recently broken up with my first and only girlfriend of 3 months and felt devastated. It took me a long time to come to grips with my insecurities just to see it all go south so quickly. I thought it was all over for me. That I wasn’t going to be able to get another woman who was as good as her.
Finally, I decided to stop pitying myself and check if these guys were as good as I’ve read. After waiting a while, they finally offered a bootcamp near my home town.
The day had finally come and I found myself sitting in front of Julian and two assistants who explained to us the schedule of this 3 day adventure, which consisted of seminars and infield practices. We sat down for the seminar and discussed some PUA topics like female psychology and body language. Some of the material was stuff I had already read about but some was new, especially the stories Julian shared with us about his own personal experiences with pick up.
But then came the best part, the part we were waiting for: going out and meeting girls.
TAKING THE FIELD
Before we started practicing any techniques the guys wanted to see me try to pick up chicks. I was very nervous and I think it showed because the first girl I approached dissed me without even looking at me. That was a hard pill to swallow, but after I got back to the instructors they explained to me how I had to approach the next women.
Julien said that I was in “detention”, which means that I should approach as many girls as possible but couldn’t get their numbers. He also told me that I should focus on myself, instead of worrying about how I was being perceived by the ladies. I tried to follow his advice with the next three girls I approached, but I still crashed and burned
Eventually I stopped caring and I just started talking to women for the hell of it. Julian had told me that when picking women sex should be the last thing on my mind. It didn’t make sense to me at the moment until I noticed how my anxiety was gone once I started treating it like a game. Like they told me, it’s all about having fun.
OVERCOMING MY LIMITATIONS
Things got more difficult when they told me that I had to step out of my comfort zone. Julien made me do sets of absurd exercises that were intended to increase my tolerance to anxiety and rejection. Many of these exercises seem pointless, like walking like I was gay; but the ones we did while talking to the girls, like trying to dance with them, helped me loosen up and stop worrying about rejection.
It all seemed so unreal, because I would have never been able to do those things in my own, that’s why I needed Julien to push me out of my comfort zone. Being able to interact with random beautiful women without being worried about rejection was an incredibly liberating experience.
On my second night I had already talked (and danced) with more women than in my entire four years of high school. It’s not that my fears were gone, but rather that I wasn’t afraid of being rejected because I wasn’t actually looking to get with these girls.
The last barrier I needed to cross was the physical one. We’d gone through the social pressure drills and street openers. Now it was time to create sexual tension and start practicing my physical game.
tried to explain to me the fundamentals of how to break that invisible barrier that separated me from women I’ve just met, but I immediately knew that this was going to be a lot tougher for me to do.
I really struggled with developing my physical game skills. Perhaps it’s because I wasn’t ready for it, or maybe I was just procrastinating, but I just felt really unnatural putting my arm around a girl I just met. I’ve never hugged a woman that wasn’t my girlfriend, so touching a woman I just met felt forced to me.
But perhaps this anxiety was exactly what
had in mind when he told me about these exercises. After all, even though I was struggling I still managed to finish my physical exercises. That’s how I ended my third day and it’s when I started thinking about what I’d learned.
WAS IT WORTH MY MONEY?
ABSOLUTELY!! Not only did I learned good techniques to approach new women, but I also got a lot of practical experience that helped me to reduce my anxiety, and be more confident while picking up girls
Am I still afraid to talk to women? DEFINITELY! No bootcamp, no matter how good the instructors are, is going to take care of that in a weekend. It took years of me avoiding my problem with women to create the insecurities I have, and it’s going to take a while to get rid of them completely.
But what has changed is that I’m not longer afraid of trying. Julien took me through a rough ride for three days, but when I survived I realized that I had nothing to left to fear.